Just over 1 year ago I referred all of my students to other piano teachers in order to take a 9-5. It was difficult to do, but also planned for. I intentionally signed up to teach through studios so that the students would not lose momentum when I eventually found that full-time gig.
However, I’m now stable in my job and a friend through work asked me to teach her daughter piano. I am very excited!
I have to say, reading through this blog after time apart, I think I can easily answer my primary question. The way that musicianship happens is through hours and hours of meaningful experience playing music.
I had a full and expensive musical education from youth to adulthood and I have never found confidence in my playing until now. Being good at music is 50% putting yourself out there (same with all arts). If you want to be good at putting yourself out there, put yourself out there often. I think my major torment was that music did not simply flow through me despite my advanced knowledge and foundation. (The idea of art flowing through artists as though from the heavens is a lie! It takes work!) I probably could have counted the number of times I had played in public. Not so anymore, and the difference is amazing.